I wish I knew how to quit you

My brother just called me to ask 1) if I have a VCR and 2) would I tape The Bachelor and send it to him. He said it was for his wife, Cathy. Since they were celebrating their one-year anniversary, they had forgotten to set the VCR. Right. What a scam. I can see right through this. I'll send the tape all right. Along with some hot man-on-man porn. Any suggestions?